My mate just hired an Eastern European cleaner, took her 15 hours to hoover
the house. Turns out she was a Slovak..
Since the snow came all the wife has done is look through the window. If it
gets any worse, I'll have to let her in.
I've been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper. To be
honest I only intended to rough him up a bit.
After years of research, scientists have discovered what makes women happy.
Nothing.
Just had my water bill of £175 drop on my mat. That's a lot. Oxfam can
supply a whole African village for just £2 a month: time to change supplier
I think.
Seven wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after they
tested positive for WD40.
A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt.
Archaeologists believe it may be Pharaoh Roche...
Just A Reminder to those who stole Electrical Goods in Last Year's
Riots....Your One Year Manufacturer's Warranty Runs Out Soon.
ITS A BOY" I shouted "A BOY, I DON'T BELIEVE IT, ITS A BOY"
And with tears streaming down my face I swore I'd never visit another Thai
Brothel!!!
Two Indian junkies accidentally snorted curry powder instead of cocaine.
Both in hospital...one's in a korma.. The other's got a dodgy tikka!
Japanese scientists have created a camera with a shutter speed so fast, they
can now photograph a woman with her mouth shut..
A boy asks his granny, 'Have you seen my pills, they were labelled LSD?'
Granny replies, f@@k the pills, have you seen the dragons in the kitchen?!
A woman standing nude in front of a mirror says to her husband: 'I look
horrible, I feel fat and ugly, pay me a compliment.'
He replies, 'Your eyesight is perfect.'
An elderly couple is attending Mass. About halfway through, the wife leans
over and says to her husband, 'I just let out a silent fart; what do you
think I should do?'
He replies, 'Put a new battery in your hearing aid.'
the house. Turns out she was a Slovak..
Since the snow came all the wife has done is look through the window. If it
gets any worse, I'll have to let her in.
I've been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper. To be
honest I only intended to rough him up a bit.
After years of research, scientists have discovered what makes women happy.
Nothing.
Just had my water bill of £175 drop on my mat. That's a lot. Oxfam can
supply a whole African village for just £2 a month: time to change supplier
I think.
Seven wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after they
tested positive for WD40.
A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt.
Archaeologists believe it may be Pharaoh Roche...
Just A Reminder to those who stole Electrical Goods in Last Year's
Riots....Your One Year Manufacturer's Warranty Runs Out Soon.
ITS A BOY" I shouted "A BOY, I DON'T BELIEVE IT, ITS A BOY"
And with tears streaming down my face I swore I'd never visit another Thai
Brothel!!!
Two Indian junkies accidentally snorted curry powder instead of cocaine.
Both in hospital...one's in a korma.. The other's got a dodgy tikka!
Japanese scientists have created a camera with a shutter speed so fast, they
can now photograph a woman with her mouth shut..
A boy asks his granny, 'Have you seen my pills, they were labelled LSD?'
Granny replies, f@@k the pills, have you seen the dragons in the kitchen?!
A woman standing nude in front of a mirror says to her husband: 'I look
horrible, I feel fat and ugly, pay me a compliment.'
He replies, 'Your eyesight is perfect.'
An elderly couple is attending Mass. About halfway through, the wife leans
over and says to her husband, 'I just let out a silent fart; what do you
think I should do?'
He replies, 'Put a new battery in your hearing aid.'